Wedding Season (3)

After I asked Adal to be my escort, everything became much less complicated, and much more fun. Instead of worrying about my lack of a plus-one, I really enjoyed my night out with the girls. I think I laughed more than I had since that my parents lit fireworks in the fireplace for my 16th birthday. Relief is a giddy sensation.

The following weekend Adal insisted on going shopping with me for the wedding. At first, I was skeptical. After all, my experiences shopping for clothes with guys were pretty much limited to my step-dad. His idea of shopping was grabbing things of the rack and throwing them in the cart. Fitting rooms? Bah! Sizes? IF you must, but HURRY! Fit and fashion? What's that all about?! My mom and I had considered it a major victory when he'd finally learned to just let us go shopping without him.

Let me just say, shopping with Adal was a completely different experience. Ladies, if you've never taken a guy-friend shopping before, I highly reccommend it. The key, though, is to take one you aren't trying to impress. Then you don't get your feelings hurt when he makes a horrible face at some trendy bit of fluff that you were sure would be perfect.
It took us 4 stores before HE was satisfied that I had found "the dress." He was the one who insisted I had to look perfect. "It's the first big social event you've gone to since New Years'," he said, carefully. Translation: since you got dumped at your own party. "You've got to look amazing."
Well, by the time we were done shopping, amazing no longer seemed so far-fetched.  The dress was a soft violet sheath. I'd always avoided purple because I was afraid I'd look too much like my mom if I wore her favorite color. I'd never realized how well it went with my auburn hair.  We bumped into Allen's mom when we were buying the slip (yea, buying a slip with a guy is rather weird), but Adal distracted her quite casually while I finished my shopping. He really has a gift for charming people. I splurged on an amazing pair of strappy beige shoes and a matching wrap. By the end of our excursion I was feeling so good I even picked up some new jewelry.

Instead of a bachelorette party, Karen hosted a pamper-party. Her older sister, Sue, worked at one of those Vietnamese nail saloons that seem to be on every corner around here. Sue's best friend in high-school, Li, was a cousin or something to the owner, and had helped Sue get the job. In honor of Karen's wedding, Li invited us in after-hours on Thursday for manicures and spa-pedicures. I've never been so relaxed. Warm, silky, lavender-water bubbled around my feet. The heated massaging chair kneaded out the cares of the week, the month, the whole new year. Laughing and teasing Karen - while trying to keep our hands still for the amazingly patient manicurists - surely this was a glimpse of heaven. Good fellowship, good friends, good feelings. What more could a girl want?

The wedding itself was sweet and simple, in a little chapel on the outskirts of town. Richard wore a white cowboy hat with his tux. He couldn't keep his eyes off Karen. She had boots under her gown, and was dancing in place through the whole ceremony. She was shaking when she put his ring on. They exited the chapel with a twirl, two-stepping down the aisle to the latest country love ballad. Charming.

The reception was unique. I suppose every reception is unique in its' own way, but I've never been to one like this. Party favors were bowling pins. Shoe rental was on the house (apparently Karen and Rich were big tournament players - who knew!). They had set up a buffet with veggie trays from the local grocer, barbeque pork sandwiches, ham, and pigs-in-a-blanket. Beer was flowing freely, and the bar was open for other options. Adal and I didn't stay very long. My goal was to leave before the boquet toss. I heard later that Colleen - who I hadn't seen since graduation -  made a fabulous flying leap to get it. Apparently she was eager to be next. I was not so interested.

Allen was there. With his new girlfriend. He even came over to introduce her to us at the reception. Deanne "accidentlly" let slip that they had just moved in together the week before. Suddenly I understood what he meant about me not being ready for a mature relationship. Oh.

Well, he was right. As old fashioned as it seems, I do believe God intended us to keep sex for marraige. Allen knew how I felt. We'd gone to the same church group, studied the same Bible. Allen had driven me home when I left Joey for asking "how far is too far" in the governor's lounge during our junior prom. He'd gone with me to console Colleen after she'd chosen to abort the baby she'd concieved with a travelling fool at the Renaissance-festival the summer after we graduated.  In all the months we'd been dating, we hadn't talked about sex. I guess he knew me better than I knew him.

I would have married him. Briefly, I considered pulling him aside, telling him that, giving him a chance to get it right. What can I say, I've seen Gone With The Wind a few too many times. Of course, that strategy didn't work for Scarlett, and she had so much more going for her than I - a plantation at the very least. All I had was a crazy family, and they really didn't like him much anyway. No, I realized. He made his choice. I didn't want any man I had to convince, anyway.

With all the leftover affection I had for him, I congratulated them, and wished them well. I meant every word. I truly hoped they would be happy, and find a way to make it last. Yet, watching Deanne, I couldn't help noticing how desperately she clung to his arm; how possesively she spoke. She wanted everyone there to know he was hers. She was broadcasting her claim with the desperate insecurity that comes from stealing a man. I recognized that message; I had seen it in my mother. The problem with stealing a man, you see, is that you're never quite sure someone else won't steal him away from you.